Feeling much better... At least physically!
Well, the weird neuritis stuff got under control within a few days. By Wednesday, Carl was back at work, and I was back in the driver's seat (literally I felt OK to drive again lol!). Had one little episode of dizziness/weird eye sensations when I was showering on Wednesday morning but otherwise I've been feeling pretty good, just a tad tired.
Lately I've been feeling like an absolutely awful mother, though. Alex is usually a complete Mama's boy but since Carl has been caring for him while I was sick, he has wanted NOTHING to do with me. The kid would literally cry when he would see me. Carl told me he probably just wanted me to take a shower - ha ha, very funny - try showering when your world is sideways and your chest wall feels like it's got a third degree burn. Ugh! Anyway, Alex got over that pretty quickly. I still feel the Mommy Guilts because Colin has been completely obsessed with the computer. He loves Noggin.com and Hot Wheels.com. I try to limit the time he's online, but I almost feel like I don't WANT to. Is that horrible or what? I LIKE when he is on the computer, because then he's out of my hair! The kid gets plenty of exercise, and we play Chutes and Ladders and Candy Land at least 10 times a day. He gets read to at least 1/2 hour out of every day. He doesn't like arts and crafts (never has). I wish I could blame the increased computer time on me feeling bad, but he was spending lots of time on the 'puter even before I was sick. I would take him outside to play if it wasn't 110 degrees out. It literally is 11o degrees out. My migraines will automatically get triggered at anything above 95. So any outdoor activity is out. I'm just awful. That's the bottom line.
The other big news around here is that I just found my *first* love on friendster and I found out that he's GAY. Well, now I know why it didn't work out LMBO! Seriously. The guy was like my best friend and then my soul mate, and then...well, I won't give out the sordid details, but he screwed me over and things were never the same after that. He went to the USNA, and did his seven year stint in the Navy. I guess "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" really works. When I found out, I was SHOCKED. I had no idea. But at least I know now that it really wasn't me that had the problem....oh no it was DEFINITELY him! So, what do you think, should I email him? I've already added him to my "friends" list. Hmmmm, what to do what to do?
Lately I've been feeling like an absolutely awful mother, though. Alex is usually a complete Mama's boy but since Carl has been caring for him while I was sick, he has wanted NOTHING to do with me. The kid would literally cry when he would see me. Carl told me he probably just wanted me to take a shower - ha ha, very funny - try showering when your world is sideways and your chest wall feels like it's got a third degree burn. Ugh! Anyway, Alex got over that pretty quickly. I still feel the Mommy Guilts because Colin has been completely obsessed with the computer. He loves Noggin.com and Hot Wheels.com. I try to limit the time he's online, but I almost feel like I don't WANT to. Is that horrible or what? I LIKE when he is on the computer, because then he's out of my hair! The kid gets plenty of exercise, and we play Chutes and Ladders and Candy Land at least 10 times a day. He gets read to at least 1/2 hour out of every day. He doesn't like arts and crafts (never has). I wish I could blame the increased computer time on me feeling bad, but he was spending lots of time on the 'puter even before I was sick. I would take him outside to play if it wasn't 110 degrees out. It literally is 11o degrees out. My migraines will automatically get triggered at anything above 95. So any outdoor activity is out. I'm just awful. That's the bottom line.
The other big news around here is that I just found my *first* love on friendster and I found out that he's GAY. Well, now I know why it didn't work out LMBO! Seriously. The guy was like my best friend and then my soul mate, and then...well, I won't give out the sordid details, but he screwed me over and things were never the same after that. He went to the USNA, and did his seven year stint in the Navy. I guess "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" really works. When I found out, I was SHOCKED. I had no idea. But at least I know now that it really wasn't me that had the problem....oh no it was DEFINITELY him! So, what do you think, should I email him? I've already added him to my "friends" list. Hmmmm, what to do what to do?
posted by slkone at 4:48 PM
1 Comments:
So glad you are feeling better! Yayay. woohooo.
As far as you being a bad momma...that so does not make you a bad momma. First....Chase has always been a super duper mama's boy. Well...when he was 1.5 he poked me in the eye and tore off part of my cornea. I was in bed and in extreme pain for what seemed like ever. He wanted nothing to do with me...just daddy. I think they can't stand us not being ok. I cried and worried...but it all worked out..and that is what I really think it was.
I so feel like that too...not about computers...but anything that gives me peace from the boys for a bit....seriously. I feel badly about it...but sometimes we just need a break. We are human. And it isn't like he is doing something horrible. Honey...don't be so hard on yourself...from one mommy to another!! I know it is easier said than done..I really do...but we are just humans first.
Wow...what a shocker about the first loveeee! Woah wowza cabowza!! That is too wild. Well...it sure explains somethings I am sure. And why not contact him....I think it would be fun!
hugsss
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